“Has your life been taken over by Wigan Athletic, Dave Whelan, Roberto Martinez,the transfer market, a warchest, posting on a messageboard, the state of the pitch, Griff and his lightsiders, loudmouthblue and his darksiders, talking tacticts, watching live internet feeds ? If so give us a call on 08001910657. All calls are confidential and costs 25p a minute. If your bollocks haven`t dropped please don`t forget to get the bill payers permission before placing your earhole onto the telephone”
“Coming up first on the show is Griff. Positive poster, part time novelist, West stander, worldwide traveller, piss poor footballer but an all round good egg. He wants to know why his nemesis loudmouthblue continually has digs at him. He also wants to know why even after all these years of the messageboard being online posters still can`t string two words together without terrible punctuation. Griff is on the show ladies and gentlemen”
Not in good taste old chap putting a photo of a deadman on here
“When i need advice of what to post off someone who posts 15 smillies to get his point accross i will get in touch with you. It`s my name above the stage so keep your mouth shut until i ask you”
”He also wants to know why even after all these years of the messageboard being online posters still can`t string two words together without terrible punctuation. Griff is on the show ladies and gentlemen”
“So Griff, you called the show because you are disappointed with people name calling your manager, continually having digs about you for being positive, and failling to see the bigger picture. Thanks for coming on the show. What have you got to say to these people ?”
”So Griff, you called the show because you are disappointed with people name calling your manager, continually having digs about you for being positive, and failling to see the bigger picture. Thanks for coming on the show. What have you got to say to these people ?”
“I never shagged that bird and that’s not my kid.”
“That`s not what i asked was it ? The DNA test will come later. What i want is your thoughts and views on the matter before we get involved in all the mumbo jumbo”
“Coming up in part 2 we get to meet Griffs regular opponent and lifelong friend of Gekko. The ex Liverpool fan who hates FC United and all it stands for who but now follows his hometown team whenever he can. The man who often slates Roberto Martinez blaming him for everything from Chernobyl to the Iranian Embassy siege. Loudmouthblue will be on the show straight after the break ladies & gentlemen. Don`t go away we`ll be right back”